Wednesday, October 04, 2006

Ann Taylor Joins Dark Forces, Commands Minions to Spread Evil

Among the pile of crap that disguised itself as e-mail today, I found a message from Ann Taylor, designer of affordable and practical ladies’ fashions. While I can’t say I’m much of a dress horse, I admit to having a weakness for Ann Taylor’s tantalizingly roomy size sixes (which, if I understand my UK sizing correctly, is the equivalent of 23 shaftments and a King’s knuckle).

I was just about to open Ann Taylor’s e-mail, when I noticed its subject heading:

Support Breast Cancer and Reward Yourself

To say that I was shocked by this endorsement of nefarious hedonism would be an understatement. Needless to say, I trashed the message without viewing its full contents, as I did not wish to be tainted by its Mephistophelian funk.

Hear me, Ann Taylor, you wicked Betty Crocker of the fashion world . . . . I will not join your evil campaign to support breast cancer for my own personal fun and profit. It is not right, and I will not stand for it.

Good day, madam.

3 comments:

anaglyph said...

It's shameful to think that in this enlightened time there are those who are doing Satan's work.

evenstar said...

"23 shaftments and a King’s knuckle"

I just sprayed my drink all over my 'puter!

Please Storchy - can I have some more?

extrastorchy said...

I made myself giggle a little with that one, Evenstar. I've been bogged down with work and school lately and I'm just winding down on a project. Maybe I'll find some time to goof around later today.